Miracles

I named this blog Life After a Miracle in response to the miracle we have received in Angie's renewal after life-saving surgery.  Since that time, there have been other miracles along the way but also many serious challenges for our family.  I have shared both and I hope that my blog has not veered from the theme that I am overwhelmingly grateful for the miracles God has bestowed on us.

When the challenges come, it is tempting to let them overshadow the good before us.  We forget to be grateful or we just can't do it.  I have been guilty of this recently and although I do not really believe in New Year's resolutions, I want to try focus on being grateful in the midst of challenges as the new year begins.  This has been a difficult year for our family and maybe it was for yours too.  We have experienced geographical separation, strained relationships, parenting roadblocks, medical concerns, and job changes.  It has been hard.  The challenges have been mixed in with personal victories, major growth, new life, strengthened faith, and the love and support of good friends, but I have not always remembered to be grateful.

We have much to look forward to.  I firmly believe that Angie will be adopted in 2016.  I will watch my grandchildren grow into almost-toddlers.  I will continue to be touched by living in a community that cares and takes care of one another.  And, I will strive to be as effective as possible in my new leadership position.  There will be miracles and surprises that I can't predict also, I am sure.

I am the same as you..........it is easy to become discouraged. Let's just admit that we are and support one another through the hard days.  Some days, it will be easy to be grateful and other days, it will be nearly impossible.  It is okay.  I want to leave you with an incredibly inspiring miracle.  I think you will agree that it is truly amazing and I hope it is a blessing to you as it has been to me.  Anything is possible my friends:

Progress?

We have finally made a small step towards completing Angie's adoption.  Next month, we are invited to go before a committee who will determine whether our family is the best adoptive placement for Angie.  We are being asked to "play up" (in the words of DHS) our roles in her medical treatments and in her life.  Really?

First, I appreciate that the state of Oregon has specific steps they must take before they can approve an adoptive placement. Many of the steps are in place because of the past mistakes the agency has made with horrible outcomes.  However, I do not think it should be necessary to "play up" our relationship or our importance to Angie's well-being.  We are her family.  Seven years have not proven our commitment to her?

So, I guess I need to plan how I will convince the committee that our family is committed.  Should I mention the major fight we initiated when the people in Salem wanted to place a DNR order for Angie, deeming that her life was no longer worth saving? Or the process of finding a doctor who would perform the surgery that eventually saved her life?  The battle with the insurance company to pay for the astronomical cost? What about the 2457 days that she has lived as a member of our family so far?  Most importantly, Angie wants to be adopted and understands the meaning of adoption.  We are the only family she has ever known.  Certainly that counts for something?

We will, of course, play the game.  What else can we do?  On January 13th, we will go before a committee of DHS employees from another county (to avoid bias towards us!) and we will plead our case.  The committee will have three days to make a decision. Until then, we will pray.  What else can we do?

Welcome to the World

I had the ultimate privilege this week.........I was present for the birth of my grandson, Ezra.  I had never witnessed the birth of someone else's child and I have to tell you this has been at the top of my very short Bucket List.  I am weird like that.  Well, I was not disappointed.  The experience was beyond words.

Poor Kirsten had a long, difficult labor followed by a c-section.  As a parent, it was excruciating to watch her labor and become exhausted and not have the result she wanted. She was amazing and strong, but the baby was just not cooperating.  I would have taken her place in a minute if I could have.  Finally, she was taken to the OR and I got to go too!

Baby Ezra is here and he is perfect. The method makes no difference when you have a healthy baby and Momma.  It was so precious to see them meet for the first time:

For those of you who love statistics, Ezra weighs 7 pounds, 13 ounces and he is 21.25 inches long.  Isn't his hair amazing?  I can't stop touching it!! I think he and Grandma are going to be best friends:

I am grateful for Ezra's safe arrival and I can't wait to get to know him better. Being able to be present at his birth was one of the most meaningful experiences of my life and I will hold in my heart always.   He is the perfect early Christmas gift to our family.

Runaway Post

I have to warn you......this might be a runaway post and if you are not in the mood, please stop reading right now.  I went to a court hearing today for Angie's half-sister and I feel like Alice in Wonderland who slipped down the hole.  Everything is so out of whack....

So, a parent who does not show up for her visits, has recently had her rights terminated for another child,  and has no stable living situation gets 3-4 more months to work on it?  After 8 months have gone by already? A father who has a history of repeated violence and is a registered sex offender and just spent two weeks in jail AGAIN gets "one more chance" because he begged for it?

Where is the sanity?  This is the system that is charged with protecting children.  And yet, the caseworker goes to court and lies repeatedly to make the agency look like they are making progress.  I can't stand it. What about the kids?  The only sane person in the whole room is the child's attorney (who is also my child's attorney) who argued that the most reasonable path is to allow the current caregiver to adopt the child. That is just too simple, though, so why would that happen?

Yes, I am feeling a little bitter.  Our own adoption has been held up by the very same system and we have been given no explanation.  The very same sex offender seems to be calling the shots, from what we can tell.  Does this all seem insane to anyone but me?

I have kept quiet for a long time, but it is no longer an option for me.  I have seen repeated cases of children taking a back seat to their parents' wants and needs.  The system needs to make our children a priority.  Every case is unique, and I can only really attest to what I know myself.  Angie continues to ask me why she is not adopted. Every. Single. Night. She has been in foster care for seven and one half years.  Does this make sense to you?